of weddings and family life

THE CAST

Momon
herpetologist, newlywed

Aldrin
accomplished ornithologist, family man

Don
engineer, bachelor

All fieldworkers, mga iskolar ng bayan, and conservationists.

After the day's workshop in Los Baños, we sat down at a table to eat dinner. A conversation ensued over releñong isda, kare-kare, and rice; and then transitioned to the more serious stuff about work, family, and the incessant Haribon tirade. These next lines hit home:

[Translated from Tagalog]

Momon: I miss my wife already! Before, I thought after my wife and I were finally married, working conditions will still stay the same. I could go on working as I used to. But in just a few days, I realized that I could not go on living the same way. A higher level of commitment was necessary. I want to go home now.

Aldrin: Take an advice from me, pare. It's different when you're married. When I'm out of the country I always think of my wife and kids, and miss them all the time [holds forehead in thought]. Even when I'm at home working and then I see my kids playing somewhere near me, I drop what I'm doing and spend time with my kids because that's my priority.

Then Aldrin continues by telling us about Arvin, one of his best buddies and a similar friend of ours who never understood Aldrin's words that change would inevitably take place once you make that lifelong commitment. Arvin believed, according to Aldrin, that he could continue single-mindedly focused on work as he used to. Later on when he finally had a wife and kid and then left to study in another country for a while, he'd call Aldrin on the phone crying saying that he missed his family, realizing that his friend was making sense after all.

Don: [all that time listened quietly in deep reflection]

Expressing best wishes (in behalf of the Lollipop Gang) to Lem and Hahai at their wedding reception at the Orchidarium, 08 March 2006.

I truly admire these men for knowing their priorities, and I thank them for once again instigating thoughts on the family life. Plans of tying the knot with the girl that I love and raising a family with her have occupied my mind since I started building a career, but more frequently in the last year or so. I'm not worried, agitated, or pressured that most of my closest and dearest friends have already begun a family of their own.

It started with Royce and Dyra, and then Kix and Donna, Ritchie and Raya, Christian and Joanne, Eric and Maui, Dimi and Cassie, Momon and April, Lem and Hahai followed. I've always pegged THE day when I reached 30. Then, thought bubbles form in my mind on post-graduate studies, establishing a business venture, and the "am i finally ready?" question.

Uncle Piping, during his last visit to the Philippines, advised me to get married as soon as I possibly could so that I would not be too old to enjoy my kids, to which I absolutely concur. Surely, that day will come--as sure and right as rain, and neither forced nor procrastinated. When I make sense of all these, it tells me that a new stage in my life is approaching--and I shall be ready.

[Photo credit: Kix Tavora from his wedding photo gallery]